When we found out the good news!!

Tomorrow morning Beth and I are going to the first ultrasound. We will find out in exactly 24 hours, or so, if Martin and I are having 1 precious little baby, or 2. Marty has to work, as holiday time is precious in our house hold due to my being sometimes sick without warning. So the more we have stocked up the better. Plus we both decided that the next few are much more important.

My post today brings me to the time, when Martin and I finally found out that we were expecting. As always, the timing was not ideal. Martin was away in Estonia on business, and I was in the hospital on an IV 'tune up' after my IVF treatment. I had a minor infection in my lungs and needed to catch up what I had neglected during invetro.

Now the story goes, that our 2 week wait ended the day after Martin came back from Estonia, and I was to be back at home from the hospital. It was supposed to be a 'together' moment, but from past experiences we have learned that planning leads to disappointment, especially when dealing with infertility and a chronic condition. So, we were on day 5 of our 2 week wait, when another IP (S!!) told me over facebook that she found out her surrogate was pregnant on day 7. That freaked me out and I got all excited of course. Beth and I talked about it, and decided that we were going to do a home pregnancy test on day 7. November 13th. I told myself, that if it did not come back positive, I would wait to do another before I told Martin. I would only tell him (or anyone in my family) if we were in fact prego.

So let me paint you a picture. I am in the hospital. Though the setting is familiar to me (I have been a patient here dozens of times for weeks, sometimes months on end) it is a hospital. Not the ideal place to be when you hear such amazing news. But for those who don't know me, being in the hospital has never stopped me. Being on IV"s has never stopped me. I decided a long time ago, that if I waited until I was not sick any more to get things done in life, well, I would never get anything done. I would never enjoy a single moment. This was no exception. So I set my blackberry alarm clock for 6:30am and called Beth just before 7am on November 13th. Early, since Beth having 6 children of her own, needs to get the day started. And we all know, it is first-thing-in-the-morning pee that's best for such things.

I remember having that conversation that morning. I remember being excited like two high schoolers talking about what we're going to wear at prom. I remember her saying those magic words, and I remember tears running down my face as I sat in that hospital bed and very quietly whispered into the cell phone. We were going to have a baby!! Though it was the most unromantic of places, it was somehow fitting. My acceptance of the things I had to do to stay well. Just like the acceptance that it took to have another woman carry my baby for me. The thing is, it was not sad for me, having to hear the news how I heard it, since I had learned long ago that yeah, my life was different. It was not always what I wanted it to be. It was not always fair, or easy. It was sometimes too hard to speak about out loud without crying. It was sometimes even hard to imagine that this was me in the mirror, the girl that was born this sick. But what I have learned in 29 years, is that my life is just as worth while as any one else's. And if it took me finding out about our pregnancy in a hospital bed, well that is how it was meant to be. Somehow, over the years, it has become my normal.

Martin found out pretty much the same time as I did, while on a train from one Eastern European city to the next. I think the way he found out was very Hollywood movie circa 1952. But that's Martin, somehow things happen to him like in a movie. haha! Needless to say he was thrilled. Shocked!! Deliriously happy.

The funniest part of the whole thing came minutes after I hung up the phone with Beth. I will try to make the story short by adding that I had a roommate at the time in the hospital. Sometimes this happens. There are not enough beds, as per most hospitals. So I shared a room with (I will say this as gently and nicely as I can) an elderly crazy lady. And by crazy I mean crazy. Her respirology problems (that happened to have something to do with her smoking a few packs a day for 45 years) were the least of her worries. I will not get into specifics, since this is not that kind of blog, but I will say that I slept with our room door wide open as I was afraid CF would not be the only thing endangering my life that moment. Anyhow, to make my story that much more strange and not-as-I-planned it, the moment I got off the phone with Beth, crazy lady slid the curtain that divided our beds open, and proceeded to congratulate me on my pregnancy. I am sure she did not realize that I was not the one carrying, but from my conversation had managed to pick up that I was indeed going to have a baby. She grinned her toothless smile at me (don't ask..please) and proceeded to fill the room with her congratulatory crazy talk. With that pretty picture, I shall say Goodnight!!