Your daddy, my hubby....

Scarlett,

There are a few people in this world as good as your dad. I know I don't have to tell you that. I see how you two look at each other now, at this tender 6 week mark and I cannot imagine the love that will grow from here.

He and I. Your dad and I. There is a lot to tell you about your dad and I. The most important thing I can say, is that before we met each other, we were truly half. Half a person, half a soul, half a life. It's nothing that we sough after, I assure you, we are both independent people that never wanted to count on anyone as much as we have ended up counting on each other. But that's what happened.

When we met we fell in love quickly. It was like a clock started when we met, and the clock started ticking, and we were off. Every minute things changed for us. Quick quick. Our love flooded our lives, we flooded each others lives, sometimes to the disdain to those around us, and there we were, married, house, all of it. Our lows were as high as our highs in the first year of our love, and the second year (which was pretty much the first year of the marriage). We did everything with full throttle. We both learned so much during this time. About so many things; Business, real estate, friends, love, family.....it was a roller coaster. I look back now and I think it was so great. Even the rocky parts. So great.

There was a point last summer that things became very hard due to so many factors. Mostly my health and infertility, and just this doom that seemed to set in over us. It was all too much may be. We had hoped for a baby (you!) and things were so hard. We had hoped for my feeling better than I was (though we knew so little about what was ahead in the year to come) and it all just seemed still. We were both still. This tested us. It all tested our marriage. I remember when we decided to fight through it. It was not a select moment in time, but I remember your dad and I having to accept that our life may not get easier, not for a while, and we decided to face it together. Not that we were ever going to separate, but really we were newlyweds, and we were coming against all these larger than life stumbling blocks. I just remember us accepting things but choosing to want more. It was a big moment for us. Right now, when we think back to a year ago, may be a year and a half ago, we think, wow how things have changed. Look where we are, it's amazing.

What's so funny, is that now your dad and I are faced with more tests and more challenges that any couple needs for a life time. But it is now that our marriage is like a shiny hard rock. One that may chip, but will never fracture. Your dad and I have become a true team over the past year. Half way through this year, when you were well on your way in Beth's belly, our world was shattered with my becoming so ill. But somehow, we handled it like veterans, from beginning to where we are now. But the last 6 months, well, we've lived a life time. Our marriage has lives a life time.

Your daddy, oh how tired he must be of my tears, of my cough in the next room, of my fearful breathlessness. Oh how tired he must be. But the man that your dad is, words leave me when I think of describing what I think of him now. When I think about how I would react to be in his shoes, I don't know if I would have his grace. His strength. Your dad has made a career of rubbing my back. My lungs hurt, and my back really hurts as a result, and he's the only one that makes it feel better. His hand is on my back whenever we're close. It's the best. Your dad plans all the things that we will do together after I get my lungs. He makes big amazing plans for the 3 of us. If you knew half of them! I love him for it. Your dad sits in this room with me all the time when he's home from work and lives it with me. Lives it all with me. It brings me to tears writing this, because it is such a sacrifice. No body says it, but the fact is I did not have a choice making CF a part of my life, but he did, and he made it a part of his life for me. No matter what, it is such a sacrifice. And it has been a lengthy one. Today, we wait for these lungs to come and we both know that things will only get better one way, and that's for that call to come. That weight is on our minds, you, our amazing daughter in our arms, and true love, the real thing in our hearts.